Six Stages of the Healing Process

by Michael Lewin

If you feel trapped, hindered, unable to move forward into a better life, I want to help. I want to see you cast off all that holds you back, all that restricts you from stepping into a new and more fulfilling life. I want to acknowledge your ability to move beyond limitations and boundaries that try to contain you. I want to offer you recognition and celebration for your innate potential to breakthrough to the new, to shape a more invigorating life. I want to see you achieve your goals of renewal that will enable you to embrace a more enriching existence. I want to see you grow beyond the confining rigors of old thought that keep you back. I want the very best for you, and nothing less. I know you are deserving of this. So let us begin then, on this process of self-regeneration by affirming our intentions to choose a new path.

AWAKENING 

Our healing journey into a new existence begins with awareness. The pain that surfaces in our lives needs to be recognized and given full attention, before we can even begin to think about transforming it. But this is not so simple and obvious as it first appears because we may very well find ourselves ignoring, denying or even repressing our hurt. Full recognition and acknowledgement of ‘what is,’ our current plight of suffering, can help release us, perhaps for the first time, from the tyranny of evasion and lead us into the mindfulness of its reality.

LISTENING

When we first experience pain, of any description, we must try to avoid the knee-jerk reactions that push it away, out of view and unattended. If we do this, we run the risk of letting it grow. The pain is in our life for a reason so we must be patient and try to listen to what it is saying. Take note of its presence and try to understand why it has visited us and what it is trying to articulate. Opening up in this way is an important part of the healing process that cannot be rushed, or pushed too quickly in order to secure premature responses. Time and patience are needed if we are to do full justice to what can be, in reality, ambiguous and conflicting expressions.

RESPONDING

Once we have a clearer picture of what is troubling us, the difficulties that we are undergoing, we can start to formulate ways of responding to them. At this stage we may very well decide to seek wise counsel in order to talk things over. From this dialogue a way forward could emerge, an appropriate route to follow that could help us move away from our suffering. We may decide to reflect more deeply on the issue ourselves so as to bring clarity and insight into the process. We may also decide to engage with meditation and prayer as spiritual practices that will allow fresh vision to emerge. But whatever methodology we choose to pursue, one imperative remains in place – the need for action.

RESISTANCE

Our initial response for dealing with our hurt, whether of a physical, emotional or spiritual nature, will certainly meet with some degree of resistance at some stage. This is very much a part of the healing journey so it should not play too heavily on our minds. Our quest after all, is one of progress not perfection. Becoming too anxious over ‘ results ‘ can impede our growth, our reclamation of health, and contribute to a diminishment of our efforts. A full spiritual maturity welcomes and accepts any gift that we may be given, or not given, through our healing work.

BREAKTHROUGH 

If we fully give of ourselves, in faith that we will be healed, then we can do no more - we have arrived at the threshold of breakthrough. There is no going back now, all we can do is wait patiently in mystery and acceptance to see what unfolds. This can be a challenging time, where our anxiety and fear, doubt and confusion can surface to create much trouble. But we must remain firm and strong in our belief of Metanoia (transformation).

SYNTHESIS

Once we enter into new ways of being in the world, which are the fruits of the healing process, we must avoid the trap of complacency that allows us to slip back. Our new presence needs to be nourished and nurtured constantly, until it becomes so much a part of us. Our familiar companions of despair and anxiety, hurt and pain will gradually, in time, diminish and fall way from our journey allowing us to go forward into a better, brighter future of which we are all deserving.

CONCLUSION: OUR NEW, HEALED LIFE

We must be committed to working with the healing process, molding its very powers to respond to our needs but also allowing it to shape us in an interactive process of creative development. Because healing involves us in a positive, integrative quest that embraces our growth and nourishment, we really have little choice but to ‘ let go ‘ and trust in its transformative process.

As in life generally, the more we give, the more we will receive and the healing journey is no different. From this knowledge we can draw so much strength and inspiration for our quest, knowing that whatever heart-felt commitment we show to our recovery it will be met with a corresponding response.

“Each moment we enter our pain with a merciful awareness is a moment of healing. Each moment we touch suffering with love we are healed.” 
  

Michael Lewin, author of, Buddhist Reflections On Death, Dying and Bereavement as been involved in a number of Buddhist organizations, currently works with people who have mental health needs and holds a degree in psychology. He resides in the UK.